Monday, January 27, 2014

Inexplicable Crushes I Have Had: Some Strange Eye Candy for V-Day!

In the past, I have had some crushes on men (mostly fictional; some were illustrations) that really defy all explanation.  I have the usual Hollywood-type crushes:  Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ryan Gosling, Andy Samberg (though I suppose that might be considered odd by some), and Ewan McGregor, etc.  But then I have had these weird, temporary obsessions that basically make no sense.  (Like this one time, I was watching Anne of Green Gables with my mom...and I found the old dude to be, somehow, attractive.  As in, an old man.  My mom thinks it's because I'm an "old soul."  Which makes me sound a little bit more normal, I guess.)  These crushes have consisted of celebrities, cartoon characters, a drawing from a board game, and, yes, some...Disney animals.  Good God.  I swear to you I am not as creepy as this list makes me sound.  Also, I have a husband who I love very much...and he's fully aware of this ridiculous list.  Don't worry:  he has a list too.  (#1 = Katy Perry.)

Scarecrow, The Wizard of Oz (photo from here)

A perfectly normal way to start off this list, right?  A fictional man filled with straw?  I know.  But I was a little kid, and he was just the nicest guy.  He is so grateful to Dorothy for helping him down off of that damn nail, and he is so sweet that he can't even scare a bird!  There was a reason that Dorothy said (rudely, in front of everyone else) that she would miss the Scarecrow most of all:  Scarecrow = husband material.

Edward Scissorhands (photo from here)

Having a crush on Johnny Depp is all well and good.  Sure, he's sexy, and yes, Captain Jack Sparrow could work that eyeliner.  But I, specifically, have a thing for Edward Scissorhands himself.  You guys, let's face it - he is hot.  Maybe not in this photo, necessarily, but he definitely is.  He is just so nice!  And shy!  And misunderstood!  He doesn't mean to hurt people, okay?  He feels really bad about it!  He can't help it that his hands are scissors!  If I was Winona Ryder, things would have been different.  He would not have died.  I would have taken care of him and stuff.  Poor Edward :(

House, M.D. (photo from here)

This isn't all that weird, besides the considerable age difference.  Ah, House.  Do I love him because he is an asshole, or in spite of the fact that he is an asshole.  Probably because.  I don't know what it is, exactly.  But there's definitely something about him.  Also, he sings.  (Squeeeee!)

Rob Dyrdek (photo from here)

I think the show Rob and Big is (was) hilarious.  And I have a significant amount of fondness for Rob himself.  I think he is absolutely adorable, I want to carry him around in my pocket with me, and I have for some reason convinced myself that he is a super nice guy to women - though all signs point to the opposite (see his song called "Dirty Girl").  I told Jared that if Rob Dyrdek somehow showed up at my door and wanted to take me skateboarding, I just wouldn't be able to refuse.  I just wouldn't.

John Goodman, the Roseanne era (photo from here)

Don't act like you didn't feel the same way.  He's like a big teddy bear that you wanted to dress up in plaid flannel shirts and go out and play catch with.  And then you could play Halloween-themed pranks on each other and take turns talking like The Three Stooges.  Dan, though, could be pretty scary.  If I had been Roseanne, I would have been terrified of him.  He goes from zero to sixty just like that, and I'm always like, "Whoa, John.  Easy," because it looked like he might have a heart attack.  Red-faced + sweaty = John Goodman as Dan.  Love it.

Adam Sandler, Billy Madison (photo from here)

Oh, Adam Sandler.  What happened.  His attractiveness steadily declined along with his he descended into kid-movie territory.  I was into him from Billy Madison all the way to...Little Nicky, maybe?  And then I moved on.  (But OMG Robbie Hart in Wedding Singer?!?!  YES!)  I really loved Billy Madison, though.  When he dances down the stairs to Culture Club?  And he's so tan and cute?!  Sigh.  Oh, Billy, Billy boy...when are you going to find whatever it is you're looking for...

Scott Disick, Keeping Up With the Kardashians (photo from here)

I know.  I'm so sorry...I'm ashamed of myself.

Severus Snape, Harry Potter (photo from here)

There's a chance it might be the actor, not just Snape, because I also adored him in Sweeney Todd.  It's the voice.  Also the fact that Snape loved Lily AFTER ALL THIS TIME, ALWAYS!

Simba, The Lion King (photo from here)

Okay.  An explanation is needed, I suppose.  I was six years old.  My favorite jam was "I Just Can't Wait to be King."  And Simba was voiced by Jonathan Taylor Thomas, who was, like, the 90s crush to end all crushes.  Hopefully that's explanation enough and my blog doesn't get flagged for bestiality or something.

Ron Swanson, Parks and Recreation (photo from here)

This makes total sense in my mind.  Amazing wisdom, a love for breakfast foods, and a luxurious mustache?  What else could a girl ask for?!  (Answer:  Nothing.  Absolutely nothing.)  (Also, I don't know if this is something to be worried about, but Ron Swanson reminds me A LOT of my father-in-law.)

Johnny Bravo (photo from here)

I mean, does this really need to be explained?!  I can't be the only one.  The shades.  The jeans.  The muscles.  The hair?!  His cheesy one-liners would've worked on me.  Just sayin'.  What a stud.

I can't think of a better note to end on than Johnny Bravo.  Just know that there will be a sequel to this post.  And maybe one from Jared, because what guy doesn't love Jessica Rabbit?!


Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Movies That Traumatized Me as a Kid

Other than Titanic, there are quite a few movies that really upset me when I was younger.  I was a pretty emotional kid, and if I'd see a particular scene in a movie that made me cry, I would play it and replay it in my head for, like, weeks, just making myself absolutely miserable.  I don't know why I did this - it seems weird now.  But likewise, if I saw something that scared me, I would fixate and obsess over that scene for days afterward, giving myself nightmares and requiring a flashlight to go to the bathroom at night.  This list definitely does not include all of them, but here are a few movies that I found particularly upsetting as a child.

Selena (photo from here)

This movie, starring Jennifer Lopez, was about the short life of the popular Hispanic singer named Selena.  (I don't even know if she was that relevant.  Remember the song "Bidi Bidi Bom Bom"?)  My sister, having introduced me to Selena and all the music I knew at this point in my life (1997), decided it would be a good idea to take me to see this movie in theaters, PG-13 rating and Mom's protests be damned.  I was seven years old, and it was traumatizing.  Basically, Selena gets shot at 23 years old by her best friend, and she dies.  I even remember sneaking in three peanut butter Girl Scout cookies in a plastic Baggie and then NOT EVEN EATING THEM, that's how upset I was.  I think I cried for like three days afterward.  Thanks, Angie.  Oh, also.  In my first grade journal, there is a five page long essay on this movie and how Selena gets murdered - this caused my first grade teacher to contact my mom and ask her if I was "all right."

But my sister also thought it was funny to, midway through TGIF on Friday nights, act like she was insane and scream at me, "THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY BRAIN."  I knew there wasn't anything wrong with her brain (besides being a dick), since she did it like every week, but I would cry anyway.  Sigh.

The Wizard of Oz (photo from here)

It wasn't so much the movie that freaked me out.  It was this poster, in glued-together-puzzle form, that hung on the door of my childhood bedroom.  That witch entered my nightmares, like, every night.  I would summon my dad from downstairs (using a high-pitched "MMMM-mmm", for whatever reason), and make him hang a plain white piece of notebook paper over the witch's face with Scotch tape.  As long as the witch's face was covered up, I was just fine.

The movie Return to Oz, however?  Different story.  That movie was messed up.  Especially the scene with all the heads - you know what I'm talking about.  Terrifying.

The Land Before Time (video from YouTube)
This particular scene.  I don't know why it gets me, but it does.  Every single time.  Little Foot's mom has just died, which is upsetting enough, okay?  And then Little Foot is SO DEPRESSED AND SO SAD that he doesn't even acknowledge this adorable little bird offering him a berry.  I mean, my God.  Does this upset anyone else?!  When I first watched this, I bawled and bawled and bawled.  And then I would rewind it and cry some more.  I thought there was something wrong with me because I had never cried about a movie before this one, but OMG THE FEELS.  :(

The Ring (photo from here)
Just Googling images for this movie was enough to make me sleep with the lights on tonight and SpongeBob playing, you guys.  This movie is some scary shit.  I can't remember the exact first time I saw it, but I remember one time was during a church group lock-in (a CHURCH.  What were they thinking, showing this?!), and I wasn't paying much attention because I was with my seventh-grade "boyfriend", who laughed when the horse jumped out of the boat and hit the bars.  What a jerk.  But I do remember watching it time and time again after that, and being SO SCARED of that little girl.  What is it about the hair over the face thing that is so damn scary?  It made such an impact on my friends and I that we recorded a remake of The Ring a year later - I was Samara, no big deal.  I don't even think I could watch this at this age.  Soo scary.

Valentine (photo from here)
This was even before The Ring, and it, along with Thirteen Ghosts, was one of the first horror films I had ever experienced.  My mom wasn't big on scary movies or PG-13 rated movies in general - she wouldn't even let me watch Austin Powers: The Spy who Shagged Me at a sleepover!  I watched this (well, I didn't watch more than I watched) during a sleepover in a friend's camper.  Outside.  In the country.  Why we thought that would be a good idea, I do not know.  There were five of us squeezed in the bed watching this movie, and it still wasn't enough people.  I was scared shitless, and I had my head under the blanket almost the entire time.  All I really remember is a girl being murdered in her hot tub.  And I still won't watch it.

Any movie involving vomit
I'm not including a photo with this one, because, ew.  Big Daddy.  Rat Race.  Cheaper by the Dozen.  Little Nicky.  Wedding Singer.  (Thanks a lot, Adam Sandler.)  The Sandlot.  Not to mention the absolutely horrific vomiting scenes in Pitch Perfect, which, even at 23, disgust me.  Vomit didn't even have to be seen - just the noises would get me.  I'd make myself sick with it, remembering the gray chunks of puke in Big Daddy being covered up with newspaper.  Ugh.  I LOVED the movie Bring It On, but I'd always have to leave the room at some point, because a cheerleader pukes.  Screenwriters!  Listen!  Puking is NOT funny!  Ever!  Under no circumstance is vomiting funny!  I've become slightly less obsessive since I was young, but this is still something that bothers me a little :)

Honey, I Blew Up the Kid (photo from here)
I just remember the scene where the monster-sized kid stomps downtown, rips a guitar off a building, and tries to play it while helicopters, what, like gun him down?  I really hated that scene.  I think it was more because of the loud noises than anything else; I was also scared of the music/dancing scene in Snow White and the scene where the owl flies in the window in Labyrinth for this same reason.  I don't even know, I was a weird kid.

The Lion King (photo from here)
Obviously.  Although looking at this makes me feel a little better (here):

Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey (photo from here)
This scene.  Shudder.  

I was also terrified of "It's Pat" from SNL (here):
And this blind girl named Patty who was on Barney once (from YouTube):
I am not sure why.  But I made my mom turn the Barney tape off whenever Patty came on.  I am a horrible person.  

Sweet dreams!  :)


Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Etsy Roundup: All You Need is Love

I know it's only January 21st, and this Valentine's Day-themed post is probably a bit premature.  However.  When I was in middle school and high school, sometimes I liked to act all badass and cynical - even though I wasn't; I wrote in a furry diary with a feathered pen, for God's sake!  And so when Valentine's Day rolled around, I would go around saying to people, "This holiday is just a ploy to sell cards; it's a greeting card holiday," even though my head was all like "OMG hearts and candy and a boy I like gave me a Hershey's kiss!!!"  I'm not sure why I felt the need to put up this anti-Valentine's Day front, but I imagine it was for the same reason I sometimes painted my nails with black Sharpie and listened to screamo music even though I actually hated it.  So think of it like this:  I am now making up for those days by going Valentine- and love-crazy.  Does that make sense?  It's like I have all this built-up energy from holding back girly squeals and NOT wearing pink eyeshadow during that day like I wrote in my diary that I wanted to.  (Seriously).  So this blog will probably get the brunt of it until February 14th.  For my very first V-Day post, here are some items I found on Etsy that would be perfect for the holiday.  Have I told you yet how much I love Etsy?!

These cufflinks are (to use a dated and out-of-trend term) epic.  My husband and I are pretty extreme vintage video game nerds, and Duck Hunt is one of our favorites.  This dog always pissed me off, with that high-pitched giggle.  I'd always try to shoot him instead of the never worked.  (That made me sound a little awful and cruel to animals.  I promise I'm not :) )  Jared doesn't wear cufflinks, and I'm pretty sure if he did they'd be fancy - the guy wears a silver tie clip, I mean...for fun! - but these are soooo amazing.  This Etsy seller has a ton of em, featuring Kirby, Sonic, and Mario!  From here for $25.

This handmade necklace allows for a mother to have her children's fingerprints around her neck.  A little strange?  Maybe, but it's kind of a nice thought.  This particular necklace is made to hold two children's fingerprints and names.  My sister-in-law has a little girl, and one more (unsure of the sex) on the way.  Audrey is four and wants the new baby to be a boy, and she insists that his name will be Plop.  Just Plop.  So...yeah.  Not sure how "Plop" will look carved into this necklace.  Probably pretty awesome.  From here for $95.

The thing I love most about these earrings is that ONE HUNDRED PERCENT of the proceeds go to animal rescue, which I really appreciate.  It's kind of rare to find something handmade where ALL of the proceeds are donated to a good cause.  The quote found on the site accompanying the earrings is:  "Saving one animal won't change the world, but surely it will change the world for that one animal."  Could not be any more true.  One of my former coworkers has a tattoo that looks a lot like these earrings:  a paw print enclosed inside a pink heart.  Love.  From here for $12.

I'm not much of a DIY-er.  I would like to be all crafty and creative, but most of the time, what I make ends up looking like crap.  However, this cute, rustic wreath doesn't look all that complicated if you had the materials.  Or you can just order a fully-made wreath and sit on the couch watching Netflix instead of getting your hands all sticky with glue and smelling like burlap.  (Burlap has a smell - have you noticed?)  From here for $35.

Here's what I learned after Jared and I moved in together/got married:  Husbands fart.  Husbands pick their nose in front of you.  Husbands sniff things inappropriately, and husbands scratch their asses in a super-disgusting way where you can hear their fingernails digging into their skin from a room away.  They just do.  So this card lets a husband know that he might be gross...but you still love him.  :)  From here for $4.

(This list contains a lot of jewelry.  I'm sorry if you're not a fan of accessorizing.)  This cute pendant says, "I still believe in 398.2", which, for those of you who are normal and aren't library nerds, is the Dewey Decimal section for fairy tales.  A very library-chic accessory :)  From here for $24.

I am a big fan of e. e. cummings, specifically this poem.  We even had these exact lines printed into our wedding programs!  I realize it's a huge cliche to like this poem so much, but I just think it's so beautiful.  I love this slouchy tank, which comes in many different color choices.  This seller has many other gorgeous book-inspired clothing.  From here for $24.

These are actual, 14K gold, vintage signet rings from the 1950s!  I have wanted one of these for a very long time; when you find them in antique shops, they're usually very expensive.  I'm not sure why I'm so obsessed with these...they remind me of the books my mom keeps that are about girls who wear sweaters with their cheerleading uniforms and who use the word "keen."  Love them.  From here for $48.

Wow, there is also a lot of incredibly geeky stuff on this list.  This, in particular, is a Zelda-themed locket.  Yes, the Legend of Zelda.  Which I play.  And am awesome at.  Jared would love it if I wore this necklace around...and for this price, I just might have to!  From here for $3.10 - no joke.

This card would also be great to give my husband on Valentine's Day...Breaking Bad is long gone, but he's still not over it.  And Jesse is his favorite character, bitch.  From here for $3.85.

This burlap pillow reminds me of the movie 500 Days of Summer, when Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Tom meets Summer and, inspired, he creates a greeting card that reads, "I love us."  And anything that reminds me of JGL is just wonderful with me!  From here for $25.

And now here's one last thing from Amazon, not Etsy:

Jared and I are far from being photographers, but we do love taking pictures.  This pink Holga toy camera has been on my wishlist for years now, and what better holiday to receive a pink camera than Valentine's Day?!  From here for $35.22.


Friday, January 17, 2014

A Disclaimer!

The prior post was not meant to be a cry for help or a way to get attention. Nor was it meant to sound suicidal or worrisome in any way. I have gotten some comments from people who seem very concerned about my mental is appreciated, but unnecessary. I am not, nor have I ever been, suicidal. I value my life too much to throw it away. I do have depression and have experienced the symptoms I described in the previous post, but it is being dealt with appropriately. I am attempting to be something resembling a writer, and I think its important to write from the darker sides of yourself too, not just the sunny self you normally seem. I wanted to write something beautiful in my last post, something people could relate to. That was my goal in writing it. Nothing more :) I guess I will stick to fashion and books from now on? :)


Thursday, January 16, 2014

This Post is Unusually Morose. You Have Been Warned.

You aren't sure when you lost interest in your life.  Maybe it was when you graduated high school and realized that your mom and dad weren't going to always pay for your gas and make you Tang when you asked for it.  Maybe it was when you were in college and you realized that you were no one if you didn't like to drink.  More likely, it could have been after you were diagnosed with something stupid that should be insignificant but has somehow changed your entire life.  But you think it was probably after him.

Everyone has a him in their lives.  You know this.  And you don't like playing the victim, the martyr.  But you didn't lose your constant reading, your love for family get-togethers, your passion for music and writing...until after he was done with you.  You think of how he would make eye contact with you across a room and mouth the words "Fuck you," then, minutes would pass, and he would mouth tearfully, "I love you."  You think of this and you laugh.  You remember how he punched his steering so hard it broke, how he said, "You are so lucky that wasn't your face," afterwards.  You remember this and you roll your eyes.  But thinking of the things he said to you for years after that doesn't make you laugh, or roll your eyes.  It just makes you sad.  You realize that if you are told you are worthless time and time again, you start to believe it yourself.

You know it wasn't his fault.  Even if you know better, you have already forgiven.  Just not forgotten.  You know it is the chemicals in your brain, some stupid gene you have, that is to blame.  You used to care about things.  You don't know what happened.  You cry for no reason and you tell your husband that you aren't unhappy, exactly, but it is as though there is a film over your life.  Like those allergy commercials where the screen is blurred, and then suddenly clear again.  But you haven't found that magical cure yet.

Your husband asks, and will ask, time and time again, if he has done something wrong, why you feel this way.  You try to tell him that there is no reason - you are simply sad and cannot seem to snap out of it.  He tries to understand - he brings you boxes of donuts, new movies that you want to see, puts little notes in your lunch - but he doesn't.  You know your life is nearly perfect; you know you couldn't ask for more.  Why, then, does there seem to be something in your brain that is switched off?  You go to the movies weekly with your husband, you play video games together - you are happy.  But when he is gone and you are alone, you have never felt such a crushing helplessness.

There are days you feel you physically cannot get out of bed.  Could you be any more of a cliche?

You have been diagnosed in the past, talked to by a psychologist whose face you now cannot recall, but that in your mind looks like a mix between Professor Trelawney and Professor McGonagall.  You watch too much Harry Potter.  She gave you a bright lamp, telling you to sit in it for an hour each night, especially during the winter - it will improve your moods.  You tried it for a few nights but it just makes you nauseous.

You don't understand what you are doing wrong - you're doing the same things you've always done that used to make you happy - you're frustrated that your old tactics are no longer working for you.  Your husband is relentlessly hopeful:  Try going over to your parents'!  Try starting a new television series on Netflix!  Try taking a nap?  He is sweet, that boy, and you love each other very much, but all you want to do, all you feel you can do, is sit on the couch and stare at the wall.  

There is no reason for you to be feeling this way.

You are so lucky.

Stop it.  Stop being sad.  Stop.

Fashion Inspired by Characters, Part 2: Movies

Continuing from this post.  There are some movies or television shows that I watch over and over again simply because there's such amazing fashion in them.  In terms of TV, it would be Pretty Little Liars and Gossip Girl (why did I leave those out of the previous post?!).  Movie-wise, there's too many to name.  But one of them is definitely Clueless, so prepare yourself for some tartan!  There were a lot here I wanted to include (especially Disney movies like Alice in Wonderland and Beauty and the Beast), but there seemed to be way too many collared dresses and aprons in Disney movies, and I just couldn't make a cute outfit outta that.

Fashionable Ladies in the Movies

Cher Horowitz, Clueless (photo from here)

Suno green plaid relaxed blazer - Avenue 32, $470
Carmina beret -, $36
Herve Leger bandage skirt - The Outnet, $581
Stella McCartney Beckett bag - Stella McCartney, $1,145
Knee high socks - House of Fraser, $8.22
American Rag Meesha mary jane wedges - Macy's, $40

During the mid-90s, Cher Horowitz was the shit in her tartan and platform mary jane shoes.  She was one of the most iconic blondes of that generation (speaking of, OMG I forgot about Elle Woods!)  I remember being EXTREMELY jealous of her closet, which coordinated outfits for her using a computer.  Pretty sure you could get a real closet like this now that it is no longer 1995.  Dionne was also pretty well-dressed, but her furry hats were just too much for me, so I didn't include her here.  :)  Cher is all about shopping, so I figured she needed to be carrying a "shopping bag"...however, this particular bag is Stella McCartney and has a terrifying price tag.  I think she'd totally wear this outfit to class on a presentation day and look like a total Betty.  Or maybe to a party in the Valley, while...rollin' with her homies.  (Too much?)

Melaina, Shag (photo from here)

Cat eye sunglasses - Amazon, price not included
Red bandana headband - Etsy, $16
TopShop lipstick in Saint - TopShop, $16
TopShop stripe crop top - TopShop, $36
Warehouse cigarette trouser - House of Fraser, $41
Ravishing Routine flat - ModCloth, $40

I freaking love the movie Shag.  It is one of the best summer fun movies of all time, and if you haven't seen it, you should probably put it on your to-watch list.  I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it here before, but I'll recap.  Four girls (Pudge is the tomboy, Melaina is the wannabe starlet, Luanne is the smarty-pants rule-follower, and Carson is the naive goody goody) go on a trip to Myrtle Beach before one of them is to be married.  It stars Phoebe Cates and Bridget Fonda and is just great and chock-full of amazing sixties fashion.  Though I love all the girls' styles, Melaina is probably my favorite.  There is one scene where she's all dressed up for a party, and she's wearing this awwwwesommme capri pants/cape combo, oh my gosh.  I love.  Anyway...the trend of crop tops is something that is coming around again today, and it is seen A LOT in this movie, particularly on (the sort of slutty, I'll admit) Melaina.  This trend makes me want to do some situps so I can pull it off too.  I also love the pale-pink lipstick Melaina wears during the movie.

Badass Sandy, Grease (photo from here)

Nars Semi Matte Lipstick in Schiap - Net-A-Porter, $26
Milly strapless jumpsuit - Net-A-Porter, $395
Pink Ladies jacket -, price not included
Josie Natori gemstone belt - Saks Fifth Avenue, $350
Valentino slingbacks - Valentino, $945

A take on Sandra "Tell Me About It, Stud" Dee's naughty catsuit at the end of the movie.  I love the pink studded heels over the red ones she wore, plus the Nars hot pink lipstick (which I have and LOVE).  And I know, I know, I know that Sandy never actually wore a Pink Ladies jacket...but it would look pretty awesome slung over the shoulders of this strapless jumpsuit.

Also, when I was younger, I adored this scene, when the Pink Ladies dress her up and teach her how to smoke a cigarette, and then Danny was all like "It's ELECTRIFYING" and in love.  But now I realize that really, this scene kind of sucks.  It's like, Sandy, if you wanna turn into a dirty girl, do it for your own damn self, not for a greaser who gropes you at the drive in movies.  (Although yeah, Danny was pretty sexy.)

Coraline, from the movie Coraline (photo from here)

Russian dragonfly pin - The Met Store, price not included
Yellow raincoat - Petit Bateau, $215
Guess Kate star-print denim leggings - Macy's, $138
Hunter original glossy rainboot in Graphite Gray - Jildor Shoes, $140

I would give anything to own a glossy, shiny, squeaky rain slicker like I used to have when I was little.  This yellow one that Coraline favors is pretty much perfection, especially combined with her electric blue hair.  The star-print jeans are a shout-out to the star-printed sweater that she wears in another part of the film.  I love this movie...Neil Gaiman can do no wrong.

Romy and Michele, Romy and Michele's High School Reunion (photo from here)

Black faux fur shrug - Debenhams, $52
Dangling cherry earrings - JCPenney, $15
TopShop metallic swing slip dress - TopShop, $30
Juliet clutch - Etsy, $140
Jeffrey Campbell Curie mule - Nasty Gal, $155

This outfit is a little wacky.  But so are Romy and Michele.  (They invented Post-Its, you know.)  The cherry earrings remind me SO MUCH of Michele (who, let's face it, is PHOEBE, no other character, no matter what you say), and I had to add some feathers, some fur, and some sparkle to make this outfit fit their classy standards.  This lingerie-inspired dress is pretty awesome and would actually look kind of fantastic under an oversized blazer, but Romy and Michele never seemed like businesswomen, no matter how hard they tried to be.  Also, these shoes are so 90s, I can't even stand it.  They look like something I could have ordered out of the Girlfriends LA catalog in 1998, along with some scented nail polish and a shirt that said "Angel" on it.  Love it.

Samantha, Sixteen Candles (photo from here)

Leopard brim fedora - 2 B Stores, $12
Chanel vintage pearl rock earrings - Far Fetch, $704
Angie top - Vero Moda, $34
Alexander McQueen floral print leggings - Far Fetch, $671
Keds - All Sole, $23

I like to think that if I were a teenager in the 80s, I would basically be Molly Ringwald with brown hair.  But I don't think I would be able to be that cool.  If 1980s Molly Ringwald were wearing these earrings, she probably found them rummaging through a bin at the Salvation Army or she found them at a cool estate sale or something - she wouldn't even know or care that they were Chanel, that's how cool she was.  I have a fedora like this, but I could never pull it off with floral prints and Keds like she did; instead, I wear it with tank tops and maxi skirts, and my husband tells me I look dumb.  I love Molly Ringwald, and I love this movie.  Specifically, Long Duck Dong and The Geek (AKA Anthony Michael Hall, who I, in all sincerity, would have gone after rather than Jake Ryan.)

Veruca Salt, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (photo from here)

Prose and Contrast dress - ModCloth, $53
Black patent mary jane heels - Marc Jacobs, $238

My parents would not be surprised to learn that my favorite character in this movie was, of course, Miss Veruca Salt.  I would practice speaking in a British accent and sing (loudly) in the shower about how I was going to lock it all up in my pocket, it's MY bar of chocolate...etc.  I also loved her long, pretty hair and her collared red dress.  ModCloth never fails to carry adorable dresses, and this Veruca-inspired one doesn't disappoint.  I updated her white tights and flats ensemble with a bit more grown-up bare legs and heels...and I am pretty sure Veruca would never say no to a little something from Tiffany.  I also chose a luxe-looking headband to dress it up a little when she wants to wear it with braids in her hair and she DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE 'EM!

 Allie, The Notebook (photo from here)


Red turban headwrap - Etsy, $14
Lipstick in Infrared - TopShop, $16
Bathing Beauty two piece - ModCloth, $90

You should know that I hate this scene.  It instills in me the same eye-rolling, gagging feeling that I get during the "to the stars" line in Titanic or when Cindy Lou kisses the Grinch's cheek and says it's warm.  Ugh.  Puke.  I am not sure why I have such a bad attitude toward sentiment in movies, but I think I might be kind of cold-hearted.  : /  Anyway!  If you mute the sound and try to ignore Rachel McAdams flapping her arms like she is, in fact, a bird...this scene is pretty fantastic.  I love Mr. Gosling's newsboy cap ("Hey girl.  Do you like my hat?"), and I have always wanted a vintage bathing suit like Allie wears in this scene.  Paired with the turban-esque headband, it is some amazing 1940s fashion.  The whole movie has a great wardrobe.

Summer, 500 Days of Summer (photo from here)

Tasha narrow bow headband - Nordstrom, $28
Lost top - Oliver Bonas, $25
Millie scallop hem shorts - Forever New, $45
Tory Burch straw tote - Neiman Marcus, $435
Eloise Spacedye plaid tights - Anthropologie, $24
Pacey driver ballet flats - Tory Burch, $193

Zooey Deschanel always looks like she raided some grandmother's the best way possible.  She is able to mix vintage-inspired pieces with more modern items to make the look totally unique.  And I wish my bangs looked like her bangs instead of floppy Disney-prince bangs.  Ugh.  Anyway.  I have mixed feelings about Summer in the movie 500 Days of Summer (because I don't know who would want to be "just friends" with the beauty that is Joseph Gordon-Levitt), but I have nothing but love for her wardrobe!  She's all about tailored shorts and cute sundresses.  I noticed that when I wear high-waisted shorts it looks like I am wearing a diaper...otherwise, I would replicate this outfit immediately!

All right, I'm off to plan some outfits!  :)