Monday, March 31, 2014

Being Sick is the Worst

Did strep throat get worse and more painful from when I was a kid?  I remember having some pain when swallowing, but it was quickly forgotten with a Popsicle and an episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch.  But I had a nasty case of strep throat for most of this week, and it was like the end of the world.  I'm kind of a drama queen in general, and this week I was really at my worst - not very fun times for Jared.

"Oh, you have strep throat?  No biggie, you're a badass - shake it off.  Here's some juice."  This was Jared's response, and it should have been sufficient.  But no.  Wincing while swallowing, I cried - cried - my way through a humiliating doctor's appointment.  (I heard the nurse outside the door describing me as "very tearful," but you can trust that it was worse than that.)  "Why are you crying?!" Jared whispered out of the corner of his mouth.  "I don't even know, but I can't stop," I shuddered in between breaths.  "I want to get a drink of water, but I can't, because it HURTS TOO MUCH."

I usually handle pain like a champ (eh, kind of), and this outburst of emotion surprised even me.  I was disgusted with myself for being such a wuss.  But then the pain continued.  For four days.  During this time, I tested my throat out, hoping each time it would feel okay enough so that I could eat some goddamn cookies.

Maybe if I swallow some spit again, just one more time, my throat will suddenly not hurt.  No.  This never works.  No matter how many times you swallow your spit, your throat will still hurt.

Maybe I could let some ice chips hang out down there, just right where my tonsils are, so they'll feel better.  Yeah, this is just an easy way to choke on ice chips.

What if I stick this orange Popsicle I'm eating all the way back in my throat and use it to, I don't know, numb my tonsils up or something?  Nope.  Now you're just deep-throating an orange Popsicle.

Well, I could probably drink some Tang.  Sorry.  Though Tang is normally tart and delicious and wonderfully 90s, it will burn all the way down your throat, making it totally not worth it.

I think I could manage some gluten-free pancakes.  Pancakes are soft!  Good try.  Your husband will burn them and also you will be able to handle about three small bites before your throat threatens to bleed.

Ugh.  Whatever, I'm bored.  Screens are hurting my eyes, and I'm tired of reading.  I'm going to clean the house.  Okay.  Just know that in about three minutes, you will be out of breath and dripping in sweat even though you've picked up like three socks.  Go lay down and do nothing.

Thankfully, I am finally feeling better, thanks to the wonders of Amoxicillin.  After this week, I am going to make more of an effort to consistently wash and sanitize my hands at work - I work with kids, and one of them thinks it is funny to cough directly into my face and then laugh hysterically when I recoil with disgust.  (Gotta love kids, right?  Right?!)  And yes, I know there are so many things worse than strep throat, I know.  But good Lord, being sick is never fun.  And this time, I'll remember, strep throat.  I'll remember all the horror and pain you bring so that next time, I won't be so caught off guard.

Hope you all are doing well ;)

Ooh!  Also!  My other blog was featured on a popular animal blog!  Click on over and check it out!!

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